Tuesday came and I felt even worse, I had this heaviness in my heart, work didn’t make it any better, I was unhappy for the most part, scared and anxious, my thoughts were all over the place. I haven’t mastered the act of masking my emotions and wearing a fake smile all day err day so I guess my countenance was quite obvious, did the best I could at work, didn’t have a choice, plus I wasn’t ready to ruin things there and compound my problems.

I’m heading somewhere please stick with me.
At night I wouldn’t sleep, there were days I cried my eyes sore, the fright and worry continued.

I decide to talk to a few of my friends, my circle is really small and I would usually talk to myself, my sis or my mom and get all the support, relieve and assurance I needed at that point in time, but I decided to share my problems further, you know what they say about problems being shared, okay.

The last two conversations I had was as if God spoke through their mouths, I gained so much light, I was at work that faithful Wednesday,  I knelt down to pray a simple prayer

I told God “He knows me better than anyone else and all I seek is His peace, I was done worrying about the known and unknown and all I wanted was that He guide me through my journey here on earth and I was willing to not fight His plan or will. In that instance I felt calm, it was magical, so quick so swift, I can’t fitit into words. God heard me, He didn’t answer in the way I was use to hearing Him speak to me. I stood up dusted myself and carried on with my work.

I’m learning to take each day as it comes, running with Matthew 6:33 and watch God settle every other thing.

We live in a chaotic world, it messes with our thought pattern, work us up and ultimately leave us feeling miserable, not the best feeling I can assure you.

Please do not bottle up your feelings, I’d say talk to someone, not just anyone, more than anyone in this world we all know what good counsel sounds like and where to get one. Most importantly talk to God, not like your Boss, or strict parent, talk to him like you would talk to your love interest, ask Him relevant Questions, he’s a question answering God, don’t be hasty to leave, wait till you get a response, He’s always speaking.

I don’t know who’s meant to see this, I just want you to know you’re not alone God loves you more than you could ever imagine, He sees all you’re going through and he just wants you to let him in, so he can help you.

Thank you for taking out time to read my blog, please share this if you think it might help someone out there. I love you all see you in my next post. Peace!

Don’t allow negative people into your life. They do not wear a batch, carry a breastplate or a crested forehead with the word DANGER!
Some people come into your life and you mistake their presence for true love. But over time, you realize all they have accomplished was to drain you; mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and financially. You look back a few years later and realize you had lost yourself while being with them.
Suddenly, it looks like you have made no progress at all. These drainage pipes in human form don’t motivate, support, appreciate or inspire you to be a better version of yourself. They are possessive and don’t want you around other people except themselves. Their words and actions may not be direct, but their influence in your life rubs off negatively. From their deeds and speech, it becomes clear that they have an idea of the person they want you to be – forgetting God has a master plan for your life. They bruise your ego, diminish your self-worth and esteem.
It doesn’t happen overnight, but gradually, you become a shadow of yourself without even realizing. This negative transformation is subtle and most times goes unnoticed; the more love you open them to, the more they pierce your heart. Guard your heart with all diligence, the people you allow into your life will either have a positive or negative influence on you. There is no way around this fact. Choose your friends wisely, choose your partner with the same wisdom. No one wants to live a life of regret, forever is too long a time to perpetually mutter the words “had I known.”
Now that you do know, watch it. Be ever watchful.
It matters little how many times they call you up, tell you they love you, buy you expensive gifts or take you on shopping sprees.
The questions that should be plastered on the front of your mind are: Does this person inspire me to be better? Does he/she motivate and support me? Are we on the same spiritual frequency? Or has it become your unofficial duty to remind them of the basic necessities regarding religion and spiritual life in general? What about belief and doctrinal systems, are they aligned? Can they protect you? Are they a constant reminder of things you’re trying to forget? Do they compare you to others in your peer group? Are they making you feel imperfect because you don’t measure up to their notions of what perfection looks like?
Of course, no one is perfect and there isn’t a one-size-fit-all when it comes to human relations. But the above listed are some of the things you should be on the lookout for if you want to live happy and fulfil destiny. Think about how far you have come with some of the people present in your life. It is quite easy to tell if you are making progress or not. If you are the type that keeps a journal or diary, go through them and check your progress level. Go ahead, do that.
Life is too short to live unfulfilled and unhappy.
Remember, love is kind, love is patient, love keeps no record of wrong, love is forgiving, it has no room for negative energies. It’s pretty hard to let go, goodbyes are sad but it’s better to be single and living in a bubble of happiness that pleases God rather than be with someone or a group of people that make you compromise your faith. Truth is, even if you try to please these people by cutting corners and compromising your standards, they will never see any good in you. Say no to bad associations and toxic relationships.
Love you ZinoP